Not Giving In...

Not Giving In..., originally uploaded by Sassygeogirl.

Well, here it is, my first self portrait.

We've been dealing with unemployment for 8 months now and can no longer pay our mortgage. We saved and saved for 8 years for retirement and now it's just about gone...

We learned yesterday that our mortgage is not owned by our bank, but Freddie Mac, the bank just manages the account. Even though the government has a "mortgage assistance program" we were told that you must be employed and making close to what you were in order to get assistance. If you don't have a job, you're out of luck. Freddie Mac received a trillion dollars from the government for a bail-out, but they won't provide assistance to those who need it.

So, unless a miracle occurs, ya know, it's raining money, or somebody gives us the winning lottery numbers, we're going to lose our house. Soon.

We moved to this part of the state for a job promotion and it's been downhill from the day we moved here.

It's depressing. Everything we've worked so hard for, for so long, is going to be gone. All of it.

I'm determined to not let this situation bring me down and drag me into the pit of depression. I'm going to fight it. The demons are at me... I can't sleep, I'm hyper-emotional, and very blue. But no, I will NOT let them win. I will survive somehow...

I'm reminded of Scarlett O'Hara in "Gone With the Wind" ... "What will I do? Where will I go?"

And the government says... "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn."